How To Plan To Leave Your Spouse

How To Plan To Leave Your Spouse

Ending a marriage is never easy. While your heart may be checked out and ready, there’s a lot to think about when it comes to planning how and when you will leave. 

We’ve created the following guide to help ease this transition of separation. 

How Much Time Do I Need To Prepare To Leave My Spouse?

While there’s no real right answer to this question, it is advantageous to have time to prepare for separation (if possible). 

We suggest that people take at least a few months to get their affairs in order and ensure they’re making the right decisions for themselves. 

If your spouse is aware of potential separation, you may be able to prepare for this process together. 

However, if you think your spouse is unaware of your decision, you may need to be more delicate with your proceedings. 

The more you are able to prepare for your new journey ahead of time, the easier it will be to adjust and move forward. 

What Are The Steps I Need To Take To Separate From My Partner?

There are many things to consider when leaving your husband, wife or partner. 

Below are just some of the things we encourage you to consider and potentially discuss with a trusted friend, family member, or therapist.

  • Am I confident in my decision to leave my spouse?
  • Do I have a plan for where I will live?
  • What is my ideal custody arrangement? 
  • What are you willing to sacrifice in the divorce?
  • What personal items will you want to take with you?
  • Are your finances in order? 
  • Do you have a support system in place? 
  • Have you contacted a lawyer? 

By discussing these things with someone you can trust, you will have a much fuller picture of your plan to leave as well as the next steps. 

What Documents Do I Need To Collect For Divorce?

When legally separating or ending a marriage, there are specific documents that need to be collected and signed.

To protect yourself, we encourage you to make copies of all essential documents you have collected during the course of your relationship. 

This can include items such as:

  • Marriage certificate
  • Notes and letters
  • Text messages and emails 
  • Insurance policies 
  • Property documentation
  • Banking statements
  • Pension Statements
  • Income Tax Returns

What Should I Do Will My Money When Ending My Marriage?

If you do not have your own bank account, it’s time to open a separate checking and savings account at the bank.

When dividing assets and money, you will need to get comfortable handling your new finances on your own. 

If you are inexperienced with household budgeting or paying the family bills, now is the time to ask questions and learn. 

When Is The Best Time To Leave A Marriage?

While there is no “best time” to leave your husband or wife, it is important to have a safe exit plan in place. 

Even if your spouse is neither violent nor abusive, tensions can arise during difficult and emotional discussions. 

We suggest that you always let a trusted person know of your plan to leave. 

How Should I Tell My Spouse It’s Over?

How you tell your spouse “it’s over” is up to you. While this moment can be incredibly stressful and scary, it may also be relieving and freeing. 

In most cases, it is considerate to tell your spouse you are leaving before you physically leave. By being upfront and honest, you may reduce the hurt that can occur. 

However, if your relationship is tumultuous and you are in fear or unable to inform your spouse of the separation, it may be best to have your lawyer take control. 

Do I Need A Divorce Lawyer Right Away?

You are not alone in this process. Plenty of people have been in your shoes before and it is important to know that you are doing the right thing for yourself. 

At Epstein & Associates, our team of experienced attorneys have extensive experience dealing with:

  • Contracts — including Cohabitation Agreements, Marriage Contracts, and Separation Agreements
  • Litigation — from varying Court Orders to fresh Court Applications, negotiations, and Collaborative Family Law
  • Child & Spousal Support
  • Custody & Access
  • Property Division
  • Uncontested Divorce Applications

Our services are confidential and discrete. 

Contact us today.